Looney Tunes Halloween Stories/Transcript
''The Mouse and the Devil'' ''The Hares and the Vampire Hare'' ''Nightmare in Acme Acres'' Fade in. Exterior: the Forest, Acme Acres, California. Buster Bunny and Godo Dodo are seen playing frisbee. In a corner of the yard, we vaguely see someone raking leaves. *'Buster:' Okay, boy, catch the frisbee! Buster tosses a frisbee. Gogo leaps and catches it in his mouth. *'Buster:' Good catch, boy. *'Gogo:' Thanks, Buster. Gogo stands and tosses the frisbee to Buster. Buster leaps, but the frisbee bonks off his head. *'Gogo:' (sympathetic) Oh, hard luck. As Buster picks up the frisbee, a menacing shadow shaped like Freddy Krueger falls over him. Buster looks up and his eyes bug out as he sees Yosemite Sam in a striped sweater and hat brandishing a rake. Buster holds up a sign reading “Yipes!”. *'Sam:' Glad to rake your acquaintance (laughs evily). He swipes at Buster's chest with his rake. Buster screams, later revealing to be a dream. Buster sits up in terror, still screaming. He stops and calms himself. *'Buster:' (sighs) It was only a dream. He sees that his pajamas are torn and that there are real scratch-marks on his chest. As a result, he screams. *'Babs:' (off-screen, very concerned) Buster?! Is that you? *'Buster:' Yes. But what are you doing in my house? *'Babs:' I came to pick you up. Cut to Acme Looniversity's playground. Buster confides in Babs. *'Buster:' ...and then he raked me across the chest. And the weirdest thing was it was Yosemite Sam. *'Babs:' (gasps) Oh my God! Buster, Yosemite Sam was in my nightmare, too! But he got me with hedge-clippers! In her outstretched hand, she holds a bit of her pink fur. We see some of her fur is missing behind. A group of kids overhears and joins in, including the Warners and Skippy, who have one continuous scratch across them, and Plucky Duck, who is incredibly shiny and polished. He sparkles. *'Plucky:' He ran a floor-buffer over me! Professor Sylvester and Professor Tweety appear behind them. *'Sylvester:' (chuckles) I couldn’t help monitoring your conversation. There’s no mystery about Yosemite Sam. Why, he simply disappeared… under very non-mysterious circumstances. *'Tweety:' Now, let’s have no more curiosity about this bizarre cover-up. The children have dubious looks. Cut to a classroom. Professor Petunia walks up and down the rows, handing out blank test forms. *'Petunia:' Class, you have one hour to complete this standardized test. Remember, the best you do, the better reputation we'll have, so don’t knock yourselves out. *'Hamton:' (raising his hand) But, Professor Petunia, I’ve already filled in all the answers. *'Petunia:' (rolling her eyes) Then put your head down on your desk and sit quietly. *'Hamton:' Okay. Hamton puts his head down. His eyes flutter as he falls asleep. He starts to dream, being dressed like a wizard. *'Hamton:' Well, I almost ended my potion. Let's see a bit of the chalkboard. I must to see what are the next ingredients. He walks to a giant chalkboard that extends up into the stars and is covered with Latin conjugat. *'Hamton:' A bit of crocodile's feet, two eggs, a perfume... This is easy. Hamton then goes back to work in his potion. Behind him, a Yosemite Sam-shaped figure made of chalkboard and chalk oozes out of the board. Yosemite Sam drags his rake down the chalkboard with an awful screech. Hamton turns in horror. *'Sam:' Time to die, you stinky pig varmint! Hamton screams and starts to run away. *'Sam:' (chuckles) You’ve mastered a dead tongue, but can you handle a live rope? Yosemite Sam uses a large rope to catch Hamton and coils around him, choking him like a boa constrictor. He struggles frantically. Cuts back to the classroom. *'Petunia:' Now, who got the answer to number seven? Hamton, still asleep, convulses violently in his chair and makes choking sounds. *'Petunia:' Someone besides Hamton, please. *'Hamton:' (screams in horror) Aagh! Aaaaaaugh! Hamton jerks violently and falls over with a thud, toppling his desk. Then he is still. *'Plucky:' Well, that was unexpected. Some minutes later, Professor Porky, Professor Petunia and Hello Nurse confer by Hamton's body which lies covered on a gurney. *'Porky:' (whispers) Wheel him out q-q-q-quietly. It’s best the children don’t see h-h-h-him. As Hello Nurse wheels him out, Professor Porky's unknowingly stands on the sheet, which pulls off, revealing Hamton’s body frozen in tortured agony. The class screams horrified with Dot fainting. *'Porky:' Oh, just get it out of h-h-h-here! Hello Nurse cringes and quickly wheels it out. *'Porky:' Not into the kindergarten! The kindergarten kids' screams are heard. Cuts to Principal Bugs' office. Buster, Babs, Plucky, Sylvester Junior, Skippy and the Warners enter it. *'Yakko:' Professor Bugs, Hamton just died at our class! *'Lola:' (shocked murmur) I don’t see what that has to do with Yosemite Sam. There is a beat of silence. *'Wakko:' Um... we didn’t mention Yosemite Sam, Professor Lola. The teachers in the room share a guilty look. *'Tina:' (grunts) Kids, it’s time we told you the true story about Yosemite Sam and put your fears to rest. (murmuring) And guess who was the responsable... *'Daffy:' (upset) Hey, is she talking about me? *'Bugs:' Obviously, Daffy. You're the one who made Yosemite Sam to disappear. *'Daffy:' Sorry. It was a accident. Okay? *'Sylvester:' I'm a bit worried about telling it to my son. *'Lola:' Anyway, it’s a story of murder and revenge from beyond the grave. The kids look hopeful. It then changes to a snowy day in the Acme Looniversity. A sign outside says "Urgent staff meeting tonight". *'Tina:' (narrating) It all started two weeks ago. We were there to discuss some budget cuts imposed to the economic crisis. The teachers enter the classroom. Professor Daffy comes in, shaking snow off his coat and shivering. *'Daffy:' (shivering) Lousy Winter weather. He turns to the thermostat. *'Daffy:' (reading) “Do not touch it, Sam”. Good advice. Daffy shoves the lever clear to the right side. Simultaneously, Yosemite Sam is seen playing his harmonica in the boiler room. He turns to see fingers of flames poking out of the furnace. *'Sam:' Hmmm, it seems that the furnace is with some problems. He approaches the furnace. At that instant, an enormous ball of flame shoots out and sets all of the basement, and Sam, on fire. *'Sam:' Whoa! He tries to open the door, but the doorknob falls off. Simultaneously, the school staff is reunited in the classroom. *'Bugs:' Our next budget item: twelve dollars for doorknob repair. *'All staff:' Nay. Yosemite Sam, partially ablaze and screaming, tries to put the flames out with a fire extinguisher. A pathetic puff of powder spurts out and does nothing. Cuts back to the classroom. *'Bugs:' …recharge fire extinguishers. This is a free service of the fire department. *'All staff:' Nay. The door to the boiler room bursts open and Yosemite Sam, engulfed in flames, staggers out and down the hall. He lurches into the classroom and full burn. *'Sam:' (screams) Help! Please help me! *'Bugs:' Sam, please. Sylvester has the floor. Yosemite Sam sits politely as Sylvester drones on. *'Sylvester:' I, for one, would like to see the cafeteria menus in advance, so parents can adjust their dinner menus accordingly. I don’t like the idea of Junior having two fish meals in one day. *'Bugs:' None of us wants that, Sylvester. Yosemite Sam unearhtly wails off-screen. The teachers turn to look at him, who is now just a smoldering skeleton. He stands in an eerie, supernatural fashion and points accusingly at everybody. *'Sam:' (raspy) You’ll pay for this with the students' blood! *'Foghorn:' (sarcastically) Oh, right, son. How you gonna, I say, get them? Skeleton power? *'Sam:' I’ll strike where you cannot protect them: in their dreams! Yosemite Sam's skeleton collapses into a pile of dust. The dust obligingly slides into a dustpan, which empties itself into a trash can. Cuts back to the office. *'Babs:' Buster, don’t you realize what this means? The next time we fall asleep we could die! *'Daffy:' I have an idea. The only thing we could do is Buster and Babs go into a dream and force Sam into a final showdown. *'Yakko:' What about us? We want to help them to defeat him. *'Dot:' (scared) But not me. I'm too young and too cute to die. *'Wakko:' (scared) Me neither. *'Yakko:' Not even for food and makeup things? (he then shows a bag of food to Wakko and some makeup sets to Dot) *'Wakko and Dot:' (changing their minds) Okay. *'Bugs:' Okay, the Warners can come with Buster and Babs. Cut to Buster's rabbit hole at night. Buster, Babs and the Warners are surrounded by soda cans. Heavy-lidded, they stare dully at the TV. *'Buster:' Okay, who's going to sleep first? *'Babs:' Could we think how we can face Sam first? *'Yakko:' Babs' right, Buster. We can't think on that before having a plan. *'Buster:' Okay. I believe I have a plan. Hear me... A few minutes later. Buster and Babs are seen wearing homemade weapons. *'Babs:' Yakko, Wakko, Dot, you stay awake, and if it looks like we're in trouble, wake us up. *'Yakko, Wakko and Dot:' Okay. *'Wakko:' But promise you two won’t be grouchy. Buster and Babs yawn and drift off to sleep. In their dream, the rabbit duo appear in the schoolyard. *'Buster:' Okay, Babs. We now must try to find Sam, so we can defeat him easily. To their surprise, Sam appears as a 50-yard giant. Under construction... Category:Episode transcripts Category:The New Looney Tunes Show Category:The New Looney Tunes Show episode transcripts